In my 20s, I made a pretty good living in banking. On top of my monthly paycheck, I got a 5-digit bonus each year that over the years grew to $30k. That made it hard to leave. It was “easy money”, in a way. As long as I did my job, and completed my tasks, I could rest assured that my earnings would go up over time.
At first, I enjoyed this so much that I didn’t notice how unhappy I was in this career. But thanks to burnout, I finally woke up from my slumber. I realized that I was in the wrong career. I didn’t belong here. Nothing about this job I had aligned with my purpose, values, and personality.
I wanted out, but I was conflicted. If I left this lucrative banking career I would no longer get those bonuses.
But was it worth staying in a meaningless job?
Maybe you’re in a similar situation. Perhaps you’re earning much more than I did back then, which makes it even harder to leave your career for something else. Or, you’re on the way climbing up the corporate ladder and looking to maximize your earning potential.
In either case, you feel you don’t belong where you are. You feel apathetic or indifferent about your job, burnt out, bored, or feel a deep sense of meaninglessness and doom.
That’s exactly how I felt. I experienced a lack of meaning and purpose in my life. I couldn’t see myself working in the banking industry for the next decade, and this made me anxious.
I thought, “Okay, I’m earning pretty well now. I can buy stuff, travel, and even save a lot of money, but why am I still miserable?”
The answer was clear, it just took a while for me to admit it to myself:
I was neglecting my deepest desires and interests. I was ignoring my personality.
Quick detour: Since I was a kid, I had an affinity for drama (not drama as in trouble, but theatre!) and creative pursuits. As a teen, I wanted to be an actor so badly. Journalism was my chosen extracurricular activity at school, and outside of classes I played the piano and I offered tutoring services to fellow students learning German. Just for fun, I and my best friend started a fake radio channel at home where we would record ourselves. Although I had some really good friends, I loved spending time on my own. Then, after graduating high school I had this bad idea to study economics and business administration, specializing in banking. I enjoyed the lectures, but I realized mid-way that I had no real interest in working in the financial industry. But I fell prey to the sunk-cost fallacy and after graduating university I started a career in banking.
As you see, nothing in my history pointed to compatibility with a banking career. The only reason I stuck with it was that it felt safe and familiar.
Back to the burnout—once burnout brought me to my senses, I realized that I was wasting my time.
Sure, I was on a promising career path, high-earning, and successful, in the eyes of other people. But so what? I wanted to have a more meaningful career and life.
I didn’t want the years to just pass me by. I didn’t want to have regrets when I was older. And I was certain that work and life could be so much more enjoyable, satisfying, and fulfilling—if I could work in a career that was right for me.
I began mentally retreating from my day job. I was there in person and did my work dutifully, but my mind was somewhere else. I began doubling down on the idea that I had to leave this banking job and dare to pursue fulfilling work.
This was my thought process. I experienced some mind blocks and needed to find ways to overcome these:
- I was afraid that I wouldn’t earn any or enough money if I followed my passion and purpose.
This was a justified concern. I had worked in banking for 5 years and moved up the pay scale. If I were to leave the banking world and start a career in something as uncertain as acting, I would perhaps land on the streets.
Fast forward: That didn’t happen. What happened was something more in between. I didn’t go broke, but acting didn’t go as expected either. I kept myself afloat by working various freelance jobs. My income fluctuated, but still, I was much happier than I was in my banking job. And I never lacked anything material.
Then I told myself: I can make it work somehow. After all, I started my banking career from scratch. Sure, it took a while. But if I could successfully develop a new career 5 years ago, then why couldn’t I do it again? Problem solved. Kinda.
- I was also afraid that I would fail.
I wanted to become an actor, but as you all might know, the entertainment business is as harsh and unpredictable as it can get. And that’s not an exaggeration. This proved to be true.
Fast forward, I did a few acting gigs and even starred in two of my own full-length feature films, but didn’t become a famous Hollywood star. Nevertheless, I couldn’t be happier about this getting this far!
So things didn’t quite work out the way I expected. But other paths opened up. I became a film producer. Then I moved to Canada, went back to school, and finally became a content creator. And I love my career now.
Back then, I was so fed up with the banking world that I was willing to take that risk. I was willing to risk failing so that I could have the chance to spend my hours and days on things that were meaningful to me (like writing this blog post for you!).
Sure, in the beginning, my new career wouldn’t generate as much income as my banking career. But over time I would get there. In return for a pay cut, I could build a career based on purpose.
Obstacle tackled, or at least I tried.
- I felt insecure about my abilities
5 years in banking made me become too comfortable. I knew the turf, and people respected my work and abilities. If I left banking to start something new, I would be a nobody. And that made me feel very insecure.
But then I tried to imagine how different my life could be. If I could overcome my fears and insecurities, where could I possibly be 5 years from now?
5 years since then, I was in the midst of the pre-production of my first 2 feature films and preparing for my acting role. I just finished renovating a house I and my husband bought a few years ago, and we flipped it for a handsome profit. After that, we submitted our applications for post-graduate studies in Canada, and shortly after, received our visas with a big smile.
It was simple for me: I didn’t want to have regrets. I did feel scared and insecure. But that fear was outweighed by the fear of having regrets. I tried to picture myself at age 50 or 60. I told myself that when I reached that age, I didn’t want to have any regrets. I know people who have deep-seated regrets because of things they didn’t do or try when they were younger. I didn’t want to experience the same.
Imagining the possibility of having regrets in the future lit a fire under my feet. I said: Scrap those feelings, we’re not gonna regret anything.
And one year later I handed in my resignation.
Here are my takeaways:
Choose fulfilling work because life is too short to spend 40 hours a week, 50 weeks per year, 40-50 years of your life on something that doesn’t matter to you.
You might make a good living in your career now, but there are many ways and many industries and careers you can earn good money in. It might take you a while to catch up to that same level, but at least in the meantime, you’ll spend your precious time working on things you enjoy.
Working in a job that you hate and makes you miserable will take a toll on your health. Both physical and mental. Even though you earn a lot of money in that job, you’ll spend that same money on treating diseases and conditions resulting from stress and bitterness.
You will experience regret if you neglect your true desires and interests. While you’re still young, or relatively young, give yourself the chance to explore fulfilling work.
If this post inspired you to also choose fulfilling work over money, then now you might be wondering: How should I go about it? How can I leave my job, the rat race, find a career that’s right for me and change my life?
It all starts with having the right mindset, and a system that helps you change careers.
As many of you might know, I have been spending the past 1.5 years writing my first book “Multiple Careers—Quit the Rat Race, Pursue Fulfilling Work”, where I guide you step-by-step to build a career that’s meaningful to you.
It will be available as a kindle book on Amazon very soon, in the next few weeks, and I will keep you updated about the launch through my blog and also YouTube videos.
Stay tuned for more news about my book! In the first weeks, there will be promotions during which you can get the book for free.
Until then, I hope this post changed your mind about work, and that this will launch your first step toward a more fulfilling career!
